Second Chances

Perhaps I shouldn’t write about this. Perhaps its importance will be swept off with this passing wind. Perhaps in the coming decade, it will be told as history. Perhaps culture will crumble from the pressure and this watered down custom, be forgotten.

The girls have been preparing for months, others for years as they were not successful in the past. On this fateful day, they are accompanied by their families and friends to the market. That’s right, it is thee market day.

Unlike we who go to the market in our worst clothes as we are expecting filth and mud, they are wearing their best clothes. Their jewellery has been carefully selected, perfume scents are overpowering and the make up is a rainbow display.

They are all smiles and they do not need to pinch their noses to salvage them of all kinds of smells. This market is a special kind of market as they will hopefully get a Kalaidzhi man to pay a large sum for their virginity.

A bid that settles the bride price the young ladies. The tradition. It is the annual open-air bride market in Stara Zagora, Bulgaria.

These markets are currently online for whoever wants to get value for their chastity. Obviously, whenever virginity is mentioned, a woman’s picture forms in the mind. A crop of young women have emerged posting their pictures in these sales agencies putting a price tag on.

Depending on the weight of the men’s wallets, the gamble continues for a while until the highest bidder scores. The girl is shipped as a parcel to the ‘winner’ and she dictates the number of rounds they will go.

This could be more of an ego issue with men other than feasting from the purest of the pure honey pots. Virginity is to women as deep pockets and sexual experience is to men.

A man must be in control therefore, abstinence is not for them. They should know how to navigate once they have bagged themselves an untouched women from whichever part of the world. They do not want to eat from damaged goods.

The problem stems from the very male species. They want to gain experience from a section of women who are readily available, then when they are ready to wife one, move to another area (read village) and get the submissive woman with an unopened cookie jar.

You can’t sleep with 10 or more women a month and in 5 years expect to find one who is intact. For if you and every other individual with a willy is doing what you do, will these “vajos” drop from heaven?

If a woman is married and during the honeymoon freak in the sheets event she is discovered to have been pumped before, trouble has been brewed. She is a whore and a slut and a prostitute.

A man on the other hand is applauded for his expertise in turning her body, in all the angles he couldn’t get right in Mathematics, to dip his dipstick into the best parts of the abyss.

To strike a balance, more specifically to evade the name calling and evident shame to one’s family, women have learnt to do a lot of things to avert their “I had sex before marriage” situation.

Over the years, secondary virginity had become a common practice as shunning sexual intimacy a period before the husband goes down the path prior walked by many, was believed to keep off any suspicions.

It worked until it didn’t. Women were calm. They didn’t become frazzled as better means were revealed to pair with the worshipping of “”abstinence after the deed (AAD)” for maximum results.

Hymenoplasty, Hymenorrhaphy or Hymen Restoration surgery. This is repairing the hymen using a surgical procedure. It is fast and easy and most women swear by its restoring their virginity power. Oh Science!

Hymen Kit/Artificial Virginity Kit. This is the use of an artificial membrane that is placed in the vagina fifteen minutes before coitus. It releases a small amount of blood-like liquid upon penetration. Virgin much.

Kegel Exercises. The first time I came across these pelvic floor exercises I knew they were meant for women who have delivered to stitch up those muscles and make the vagina tight once more. Apparently not!

We are all supposed to be doing them (women that is). Virgins and non virgins alike, let’s avoid being discriminatory here. It is pretty simple as all you have to do is contract and relax your muscles for a few seconds.

Although they are best done lying down, you can perform them just about anywhere anytime. Get your kegel on ladies. Do not get bored in class or in line. You can combine them with Yoga for stronger muscles.

There are other methods used such as the Geisha Balls (Ben-Wa Balls) and Intimate Secrets of Eve said to increase your elasticity as it wears out with time. You know, wear and tear? (Raises eyebrows)

It gets interesting for team natural who are into organic products. Aloe Vera is what you go for. The gel from the leaves works wonders on skin elasticity and flexibility as it is nurtured for elastin and collagen repair.

You can use it to prevent vaginal dryness and irritations. Aloe Vera essentially eases genital problems.

As you lie there in a giant bed, legs intertwined in amorous bliss, beating your chest having bagged a pristine woman evidenced by the red patch on the white sheets, she smirks. You have been played!

In most societies, especially African as well as religious, virginity is highly valued. The hymen, a thin membrane inside the vaginal opening is the traditional representation of being chaste.

The hymen however, could break due to other activities aside from sexual intercourse such as bicycle riding. Not every woman will deposit that red. Factors like inadequate lubrication and rougher than rough sex can stop it.

How about we all become honest with our status beforehand? Let it not be said I am preaching sexual impurity. We all have different beliefs and we cannot impose them on others as we think them to be right.

How important is this virginity? Is it so crucial that we are ready to be cheaters and cheatees for it? What heights would you scale for sexual purity?