Layer of skin over another
I’m better of standing
For when I sit down
Unending rings surround me
Round and round they go
Covering up any evidence
That beneath I’m made up of bones.
I can count my friends on one hand
The rest laugh behind my back
They discuss me with their subconscious
But when in groups
They laugh describing each part
I disgust them
They don’t say it out loud
But I know..
When we are having a Girls’ day out
They sneer when I order an extra plate of fries
The nights we decide to stay in
They whisper when I add another spoon of soup
Or serve myself an extra piece of chicken
Look at her
She shouldn’t be eating at all
I can read the words from their eyes
On hot days
We head to an ice cream joint
They all order different flavours
Chocolate, strawberry, vanilla
At times, they get a mixture of the variety
But when it is my turn
They expect me to take water
Can you imagine?
Plain mineral water!
They hope it will wash away the fats.
I prefer my so-called friends
For my family looks down upon me
At the breakfast table
They all watch as I sugar my cup of tea
Hiyo sukari imetosha!
One spoonful for me but several for them
Endelea tu hivyo, utapatwa na kisukari.
An aunt chips in
I should be having her slender frame
She thinks she is hotter than me.
As sad as it is
My self esteem hails from men
How they marvel at the sight
Of my behind shaking when I walk
Some ask for my number
Tako lako limenichizisha!
I smile at my phone reading the text over and over
I cover my wide body
Ready to sleep.
You don’t need the gym
My mother keeps saying
Time after time when I request for the membership fee
Start by skipping the rope
Walk around more
Keep yourself busy for heaven’s sake!
You are way too lazy
I can’t tell her I’m trying
I have been taught not to answer back my elders.
All I can do is sit here
These rings of my existence
Will have had enough of tormenting me
Slowly they will shrink away
Leaving me with the ‘perfect’ body size..